Ponder This...Sums and Values

Ponder, what is the sum of you?

What do you value?

There are generations of women and men who were given different value systems, today, we will touch upon a few and evolve from there. For generations women were taught to value her genitalia as if it were the sum of her. Hold sex hostage, make an intended lover wait some unknown amount of time. After the "proper" amount of dates, gifts and other factors he could enjoy the sum of her. Never mind her needs, sexually, for it was all about him. My question to women is who and what is the prize, you or your intended lover?

Men, on the other hand were taught to value their accomplishments, their cars, how much money they make. For a man to have many lovers is accepted. Yet, a woman who has explored her sexuality is a whore? Men, we are taught, have no conscience and women are made painfully aware of theirs at an early age. Men, I ask you, aren't your genitalia just as valuable as a woman's?Honestly and with honesty ask yourself this question, women, you know almost instantly whether or not you are sexually attracted to a man. Men, how many dates before you begin to feel you are owed something for your efforts?

When you meet someone that you are interested in, what is the first question that you ask? Is it, "so what do you do," "where did you go to school?" As if either of those answers will tell you who the person really is. Every day and every date is a masquerade ball. We wear the mask we believe our intended will like the most. Our concept of a first date is generally, dinner and a movie. Now, where you go for dinner is critical. Do you go somewhere loud, like a sports bar or somewhere quaint and quiet, where you can really hear what the other is saying? A movie, what kind of conversation can be had during a movie?

Isn't the purpose of the first date to get to know one another to see if there is cause for a second date? Why don't we ask the questions we really want answers to?How many times after awhile in a relationship have you said to your mate, "you weren't like this when we first got together" or had it said to you? Has it ever occurred to you that sometimes, we are sexually attracted and only sexually attracted, do you know that it’s okay? The best lover isn't always going to be the best friend or best mate and vice versa. Have you ever taken yourself out for a date?

Seriously, try it.

Bought yourself flowers? Where did you buy from, the corner vendor, the supermarket or did you take the time to go to a florist and select the perfect bouquet? Pay attention, at dinner, do you listen, with intent to your own thoughts or are you allowing your subconscious to "over talk" your conscious? Now, imagine how someone else feels at the end of a date with you. There are plenty of women who have followed the "rules" and succumbed after the proper amount of dates and their intended disappeared into thin air, never to be heard from again. Likewise, there are those who've pursued their passion and attraction immediately and went on to have great relationships. The key is to have no expectations and be, not act, be you.

Sex is only the culmination of deeper, spiritual connections. It is the closest two humans will ever come to being one. It is an exchange of energy, good, bad and gray. Women, the womb is a universe, a creative space, a nurturing place, know that when you engage in sex, that you absorb more than a mans ejaculate, you also absorb his energy. The same applies to men. Be mindful of that when considering casual sex. Do you really want to absorb someone else's emotional baggage? Condom or not, there is still an energy exchange. Honor your vessels, this cloak of skin and armor of bones that houses who we really are, spirits encased in flesh.

Look deeper than what your two physical eyes can see. Look at a person with your third eye; listen to your "gut" (God Instinct) for it will tell you all that you need to know. When looking for love, look no further than the mirror, for that is where love starts and grows from.

To expect someone to love you more than you love yourself is fodder for the delusional. For those that view men as dogs know that a dog’s mate is a Bitch, so if you are attracting dogs, well... For those who say I like her/him, but he's/she's too nice, what does that mean? We must unlearn the old and learn someway new.

You cannot be independent and be in a relationship. We must learn interdependence. Acknowledge each other’s strengths and weakness' and grow from there. I ask again, what is the sum of you and what do you value?Happiness is created, not found!!!

Food for thought is nourishment for the soul-Ashtoreth